I arrived home from my mission in the spring of 2010 and decided that I needed to complete my list of saving ordinances as soon as possible by finding my eternal mate. My mission president was very adamant that we waste no time in searching for a wife. He made it clear that we were not given a timeline as to when to get married, but what he expected of us, and in his words, was to “actively be searching for an eternal companion.” When I got home I was a little bit overwhelmed by the feat and didn’t spend much of my first semester dating.
In the fall of 2010 I decided that I needed to follow the council of President Uchtdorf who said “Brethren, the secret to finding the girl of your dreams is to get to know many of them.” I recognized that it was time for me to get serious and the whole living-with-six-guys thing needed to come to an end. I remember one morning waking up and seeing my good friend and roommate lying on the bed next to me and I said to him “Ken, I have really enjoyed living with you but I think I am done waking up next to a dude,” he agreed. I made a goal for myself that I would go on about 2 dates a weekend if I was going to make up for lost time. I am proud to announce that I did a very good job at upholding that goal and I was actively dating every weekend. As time went on I was beginning to worry that I wouldn’t find the girl of my dreams. Even though I was dating many different girls, I wasn’t finding a girl that made me want to jump head first into a committed relationship. What was happening, however, was that the more girls that I got to know, the more I understood what I wanted and didn’t want in a future wife. With all the dating that I had been doing, I was creating for myself a list of likes and dislikes. Now this list, mind you, wasn’t a list of physical traits like hair or eye color, it was a list of character attributes, desires for the future, and styles of living. I learned that one of the most important things for me was to be with someone that was sweet and sincere. I wanted to meet someone that wanted to lose themselves in the service of others and enjoyed her divine role as a nurturer and mother. I wanted someone that thought with her heart.
In the fall of 2010 I had decided that if I wanted me meet more girls then I needed to be more involved in extracurricular activities. I joined a student-run fireside choir by the name of “From the Heart.” Almost every Sunday we would put on a fireside for a ward at BYU Idaho. I really enjoyed the opportunity that it gave me to bear my testimony of my Savior Jesus Christ through song. I also really enjoyed the opportunity that it gave me to meet girls that enjoyed bearing testimony of the Savior Jesus Christ through song. Although I didn’t have much success that semester with the girls in the choir, things were about to change come winter 2011.
In January of 2011 I returned to school for my 3rd semester at BYU Idaho. I was approached by one of the presidency members of the choir about passing out fliers to help recruit. I was more than happy to do. That next Saturday I arrived to pass out the fliers and there were already a group of people there. All of them were previous members of the choir. There were some that I knew and some that I didn’t know because they were returning to school after taking a semester off. As I approached, a couple of people saw my coming and called me by name. As they were saying hi to me I noticed an unfamiliar, but very cute face. She approached me and said “Michael Petty? I’ve heard about you. Sharli (another member of the choir) said that you were amazing and that I should meet you.” Hearing a beautiful, adorably freckled-faced girl tell me that she heard I was amazing and that she needed to meet me caught my attention. She and I talked for about only 10 minutes before we all went our separate ways to pass out flyers. While we were talking I noticed a few things 1. She was beautiful 2. She was sweet 3. She was from Southern California (I had always wanted to get married in the San Diego temple, but I realized that I would most likely marry where my wife’s family was from. Knowing this I would pay special attention to the girls from southern California) 4. She had freckles on her face 5. We had a lot in common 6. She was beautiful 7. She was sweet. As we all went our separate ways I couldn’t get her off of my mind. I knew almost right away that if I could take a girl like her on a date, then I would be a lucky man. Just in that little time that we had together I could tell that she met much of what was on my list of things that I was looking for, as strange as that sounds. As we finished up the passing out of fliers I stopped the then president of the choir and asked “What was the name of that girl that I was talking to? Is she dating anyone? What is she like? Just tell me everything you know about her.” Knowing that we had mutual friends through the choir I began asking more about her to everyone that might know her. That night I went home to my roommates and announced “Roommates…I have found the girl that I am going to marry.” They all seemed quite amused by this since they were the ones that I would come home to and tell them my woes of being unable to find the right girl. I would often talk about girls that I had met during the day and lament that I just wasn’t finding what I was looking for, or that things just weren’t working out with the ones that I thought had promise.
As time went on I would often see this girl of my dreams at choir practice. It seemed that the more that I saw her, however, the less courage I had to talk to her. Now this was something new for me because I had found that through my habitual dating I had able to talk to girls with little to no problem. Nevertheless, this new girl had intimidated me beyond all the rest. Remember…she was the girl that I had announced that I would be spending the rest of eternity with and I didn’t want to risk saying something stupid and ruin it all. The president of the choir, knowing that I was interested, once asked if I had asked her out yet. I turned to him and said “are you crazy? Look at her, she is amazing! (We both looked at her from across the room and she was beautiful, smiling and her hair was blowing in the wind) Do you see what I mean?” He laughed and told me that he would do what he could to help me. From then on the presidency of the choir took it upon themselves to help us get to know each other better. Looking back this is probably why she and I were positioned to stand next to each other during practice and performances. It was during practice that I learned that I loved to make her laugh so I could her infamous, and infectious laugh.
On one fateful day, that I will never forget, I received a group message from the girl that made my heart beat a little faster. It was a message that said:
The Girl - Sooo...I was wondering if you or anyone you know that's at BYU I or Utah area and is driving back to Southern California for next weekend when we have monday off! I really wanna go home to surprise my sister cause she's in the musical that Vista's putting on! I am willing to pay for gas! I can leave anytime on Friday and can get back late Monday or even Tuesday!The shows on Saturday! Just let me know!!
OR even if you're not from California and have a car and just wanna get out of Rexburg for a few days!! I hear a Road Trip calling!!
OR even if you're not from California and have a car and just wanna get out of Rexburg for a few days!! I hear a Road Trip calling!!
Now I knew that this was my chance to finally get to know her. I calmly replied:
Michael - extremely tempting...
Looking back that seems like a creepy response. She bravely responded:
The Girl - Michael...let's talk. Haha
We did talk about it and ended up setting a road trip to San Diego so that she could see her sister. I told her that I wanted to see family and friends from my hometown of San Diego, which was very true, but…well…let’s just say I knew precisely what I was doing ;) As the time for the road trip came near I began to get a little nervous about financing the trip. Being a poor college student my head started to get a little dizzy at the prospect of spending upwards of $300 on gas. Not to mention that gas went from about three dollars a gallon to about three twenty a gallon only a week before. We were leaving on a Thursday night and that same week on the Monday morning I woke up thinking “there is no way I can afford to make this trip.” That day I was debating whether or not I should cancel the trip when I received a phone call from my crush saying “I have been trying to find people to come on the trip with us, but I can’t seem to find anyone. Would you be still willing to go even if it is just you and me alone in the same car for 32 hours?” I heard my self say, “but of course!,” and it was said with a smile. From then on the financial burden of the trip was no longer an issue and I looked forward to it all week.
The day of the road trip came and we decided to leave that Thursday night and drive to my sister’s house in Farmington, Utah and spend the night. The drive down from Rexburg, Idaho to Farmington, from what I can remember, went quite smoothly. Except an incident at the Maverick gas station leaving Rexburg. My car came equipped with a fuel door that locked with my ignition key. I had some issues with the lock freezing in the past but I didn’t think that it would be an issue on our trip. At the gas station, the lock froze over and I couldn’t seem to open it. I worked on it for a while but I couldn’t seem to get it open. She came outside of the car to see if she could help but I calmly told her that everything was fine. I started to get a little nervous that she would figure out that she was driving all the way to southern California with some guy that she really didn’t know. When she got back into the car, I grabbed a screw driver and pried the fuel door open enough that I could grab it with my hand. After getting a grip on the door I yanked it open, breaking the lock. I wasn’t going to let anything get in my way of this trip! After that we left on our merry way.
From what I can remember the trip down was so much fun. I just remember that the whole time that I was with her I couldn’t be happier. We told stories, laughed about mundane things, and talked about what we wanted for the future. There were multiple times that I would look over at her while she was talking and I would just think to myself “I can’t believe that I am sitting in the same car with Janay Marie Peeler.” There was something so special about her: the way that she spoke, her desires for the future, her ability to make me laugh, her heartfelt stories and the list goes on. Although I had gotten to know many girls in my year off the mission I felt like I was the luckiest man on earth to be talking to this girl. Just that fact that she gave me the time of day was enough to keep me happy, not to mention that fact that I felt like we were becoming closer friends as the hours slipped away. Once we arrived in her hometown of Murrieta, California we found her sisters high school and I dropped her off there. It was the strangest thing to watch her run inside of the school’s auditorium because I could already feel myself missing her. It was no more than one day that I had gotten to know her, but I was very much shocked at how good it went. As I drove away from the school I couldn’t help but smile because I knew that in a few short days we would be doing the trip all over again. I had finally found a girl that kept my interest, and boy was she keeping it!
I loved my time in San Diego. I saw my brand new nephew Dane Petty and spent the bulk of my time with one of closest friends, Ken Adkins. It was such a needed break and I soaked up the Californian sun while I could. As Monday approached I was getting more and more excited. I tried to refrain from calling her on the phone or texting her during her weekend with her family, but I have to admit that when I called her to ask the price of gas in Murrieta I was really just calling to hear her voice or maybe see if I could make her laugh (still one of my favorite pastimes to this day). Monday came and I woke up at five o’clock in the morning so that I could get to her house early enough to make it back in one day. I arrived precisely when I said and was invited in for a quick breakfast before we left. We started out on the open road and things felt strangely back to normal. We told each other of the wonderful weekend we each had and reminisced about the first ride down. We started right back to talking and the hours seemed to fade away. As we approached State Line she said “I would just love to go on a roller-coaster!” Taking the hint I pulled off the free-way at Buffalo Bills and we decided to investigate the roller-coaster at the hotel. After finding out that it was not open until later in the day we decided to continue on to Las Vegas and find another roller-coaster.
In Vegas we found a roller-coaster to ride but it wasn’t open for another hour. We decided to stop anyway. While in Vegas we were walking through the Sahara Hotel and we came to a concierge desk. I thought it might be fun to ask for ideas on fun things to do in an hour. The lady behind the desk asked if we were married and without skipping a beat Janay responded “yes we are.” I then interjected and said “Janay…please…not quite yet. We are still very much engaged and…that is so funny that you ask if we are married because I was actually mentioning to this lovely lady that I we should just elope while we are her in Vegas.” The lady behind the desk wasted no time in grabbing the phone and she asked “so…if you want me to make a call into our hotel’s pastor I can have you married this morning.” Realizing that things were going a little too fast I told the lady that we just weren’t quite ready and her mother might not approve. We left the hotel laughing together. We then went to the Stratosphere across the street and walked through the shops. Coming across a perfume shop, I convinced Janay to go in with me so that I could have her choose cologne for me. I needed a girl opinion; well…I needed this girl’s opinion. The lady at the perfume shop assumed that we were together and we chose to go along with it. After narrowing the choices that she gave me down to two, the lady at the shop said “now it’s time to have the lady choose.” She had me stand there while she sprayed the two colognes on each side of my neck. She placed Janay in front of me and then said “Ok, honey, what you are going to do is close your eyes and pretend that you and him or curled up somewhere nice.” I interrupted, “at the beach?” The lady at the shop said “of course,” and continued “you two are on a beach and you are nuzzled up close to him. Now, which of these two colognes would you rather smell?” Janay, timid at first said “I’m not really sure.” The lady then said “That’s ok, try again. You are both on a beach somewhere and no one is around. You are snuggling up close to him and you put your head on his chest and take in a deep breath. Which of these two smells would you rather smell?” Janay tried both colognes, opened her eyes, and pointed at the right side of my neck and said “this one.” I bought the cologne without any further delay. I also picked a perfume for Janay and we later wore them on our dates.
After leaving Vegas we ventured on up to her Grandparents house in Saratoga Springs, Utah and enjoyed a delicious dinner with the both her Grandmother and Grandfather Peeler. After dinner her grandfather and I spoke for about an hour about my future career plans and other very manly things while Janay and her Grandmother cleared the table. I couldn’t help but think while she was in the kitchen with her grandmother and I was talking with her grandfather, “I could get used to this.”
We left the Peeler’s home that evening and kept on driving up to Rexburg. Things felt different for me while we were driving back that night. I remember it was dark and I was telling a story to very captive audience of one. She had her seat back and was resting her head on a pillow while staring up at me. That night as we drove I don’t remember exactly I was saying, but I do remember her slight smile and the occasional playful nudge on the arm when I teased her about something. I couldn’t believe that this was happening to me. The girl that I had been thinking about all semester was sitting next to me in my car as we drove and, for as much as I could tell, things were going amazingly well. We stopped off at my mother’s home to rest for a few hours before we finished the trip the next morning. We arrived in Rexburg as the sun came up and we both were both smiling as it did. I was confident that we had a great time and as I dropped her off I asked her on a date for the next Thursday. She was kind enough to accept. I have to admit that the road trip was the most money I had ever spent on a first date, but it was well worth it.
That day, after getting home, I couldn’t believe how much I missed Janay. I was so shocked by it that it started to startle me. I began to wonder if I was suffering from depression. I remember lying on the sofa with my hood on ranting to my roommates about how much I missed this girl and how scared I was that she didn’t miss me back. They all assured me that everything would be ok, but I had to know for sure. We would see each other every so often like at choir or a quick lunch date. She was a busy girl and I wasn’t as busy since I was only taking 9 credits that semester. It gave me a lot of time to stew about what her feelings were for me. I asked her on a date to the BYU Men’s choir concert a few weeks after the trip later. The night of the concert I couldn’t stop smiling inside at the fact that I was with her again. We thoroughly enjoyed the concert and went to the lounge of her apartment to talk. We were playing pool when we both began to talk about how much each enjoyed the trip we had taken a couple weeks back. We began to flirt and there was some talk about her being beautiful and me being fun to be around. As this began I strategically placed myself on the other side of the pool table from her just in case I was tempted to kiss her. You see, it had been a long time since I kissed a girl that I really liked, almost 3 years and I was afraid that it might happen that night. She inched closer before she ran up and wrapped her arms me. We stood there and just held each other for a moment when I noticed something strange. I said “Janay, are you ok? You are kind of breathing funny.” With her head resting on my shoulder she told me “it’s been a long time since…” I stopped her, “since you’ve hugged someone?” She laughed and openly admitted “No, silly, since I’ve kissed someone.” I pulled back, looked her in the eyes, and as much as I tried not to, I gave in.
From then on Janay have spent almost every day together. Though it seems impossible to love her more then I already do, I love her more each day. She is, and always will be, that girl that made my heart skip a beat when I first laid eyes on her. She was the girl that wanted to date more than any other girl in my time at BYU Idaho and come September 3rd will be my beautiful wife. I am blessed beyond what I deserve and her eternal happiness has become my greatest goal. Janay Marie Peeler, I love you.
- Michael
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